Fic: Heart Connection (1/1 Criminal Minds)

[thefrogg]

Title: Heart Connection
Series: Of Innocence and Empathy
Author: Frogg
Beta: Fireness
Rating: FRT-13, non-explicit slash
Disclaimer: I don't own them. Damnit.
Challenge: 50episodes – Criminal Minds, Morgan/Reid
Table: 2
Prompt: 7. Betrayal
Word Count: 641
Author's Note: Tearjerker warning.
Author's Other Note: Read Illogical Knowledge and An Innocent Secret first.

*twang* "Message for you, sir!"

Lancelot's squire from Monty Python and the Holy Grail interrupted Garcia's idle blogsurfing. A few keystrokes shifted monitor displays around. "Oh, honey, what is it this time?" she lamented, reading the subject line.

Gar...Penelope, please don't kill me...

Swiftly making sure the door was shut and locked behind her (not that anyone still in town was at all likely to intrude), Penelope opened Spencer's email.

I feel like I'm trespassing, and you're the last person who'd want to hear me talk (Ok, fine. Read.) about this, but I can't go to anybody else. And I have to talk to someone before I explode.

I know you and Morgan. I don't know. I'm not the most perceptive person when it comes to personal relationships, and I never could figure out how far your relationship with him went. So if I'm stepping out of bounds, please forgive me. And keep any ass-kicking I deserve metaphorical?

"Oh, dear," Penelope murmured to herself, suddenly realizing where this was going and castigating herself for not making it clear. How could Reid know?

I thought it would be easier this way. Email you and tell you and let you have your reaction and think about it before I actually had to face you, but it's just as hard typing it.

I can barely admit it to myself. Much less someone else.

Even so, I owe it to you to tell you myself. Even if I am taking the coward's way out and doing it from halfway across the country.

I love him. I mean, I'm in love with him.

It hurts.

After what he did for me in Albany, I thought it would be awkward, if only for a day or two, but it wasn't. It just made me more aware of him somehow.

Chicago...I can't imagine how much it hurts. Hurts him to have us know. Hurts to know he failed all the other boys who were victims after he escaped.

Hurts me not to be able to help. To want him the way I do, to crave his touch, and know he'll never want me that way.

Tears stung, blurred Penelope's vision. She paused, turning away from the computers to grab a tissue, dabbing at her eyes. "Damn." Her mascara was ruined, but it didn't matter. Reid did.

And once again she had to wonder at the bond of social awkwardness that had sprung up between them, to let Reid pour his heart out to his perceived rival.

Chest still tight, heart in her throat, she turned back to Reid's letter.

I returned the favor last night. I couldn't stand to hear him and got the key to his room from Hotch. God only knows what he thinks is going on.

Especially with what happened this morning. (See postscript.)

He cried, Penelope.

I know what happens to child molesters in prison. I know what's going to happen to Carl, if it hasn't happened already.

Somehow, it's not enough. I'm not sure what could be enough to repay this kind of pain.

Morgan's. Damien's. The rest of the kids in Chicago, the ones Morgan couldn't protect.

Mine.

If I can't have him, at least I can be his friend.

It's better than nothing at all.

Love,
Reid

Penelope squeezed her eyes shut, tears sparkling down each cheek. "Spencer," she muttered determinedly, "the field is clear. You're exactly what he needs. And you'll get him, or my name's not Penelope Garcia." Grabbing another handful of tissues, she blew her nose and dried her eyes, viciously suppressing the urge to cry before turning back to the screen.

A moment later she was laughing, printing out a copy and tacking it to her corkboard.

Things Spencer Reid is No Longer Allowed to do at the BAU

1. Must not refer to Hotch as "Mom".

~~~the end~~~

Previous:  An Innocent Secret
Next:      To Honor Wisdom

Comments

[jalabert.livejournal.com]

More, please.

I'm loving this series of tiny glimpses into Morgan and Reid's relationship.

[thefrogg.livejournal.com]

Well, I suppose you're in luck. I have another 14 stories plotted, and tons more I should write but don't have plotbunnies for (yet).

And thank you!

[(Anonymous)]

this series is just...amazing. i don't even have the words to express how much i love it, i just do. each chapter seems like the best one, and then another one shows up and i'm like, no, no, this is the best! and so on, and it completely makes my day when theres a new chapter up.

[thefrogg.livejournal.com]

I repeat:

It's your new favorite chapter! Aaaagh!

::flees::

Ahem. So glad to be making your day!

Also, if you have something you want to see in the OI&E universe, feel free to ask. Rules/guidelines for story requests are up...uh...::goes to look::

Here. (http://thefrogg.livejournal.com/12531.html)

Of Innocence and Empathy

[(Anonymous)]

I've been reading your series and really enjoying it. I think you have a great handle on Reid and Morgan. Loved "Mom."

Re: Of Innocence and Empathy

[thefrogg.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

I only wish I had as good a handle on Hotch and Gideon.

Did that sound as kinky to anyone else as it did to me?

[soraidh.livejournal.com]

I'm such a Garcia fan. And I love her interaction with Morgan. I've always thought of it as more brother/sister though but I can see how Reid, with his new-found knowledge, would be concerned. Love that it's Garcia he pours his heart out to. And her response.

Please tell me that you're adding to the list Spencer Reid is not allowed to do at the BAU as this goes on. That'd be so great.

[thefrogg.livejournal.com]

Geeks of the world, unite! It's kind of funny. Morgan and Garcia's relationship is the hardest for me to write, which...uh. I think I've actually more or less completely managed to avoid writing at this point.o_O Scary.

I thought about adding to the list, but I really haven't had any other stories that lent themselves to it. Most of what would apply would be in a not-so-funny way ("Must not get myself kidnapped", etc.). If you can come up with some suggestions, I'm all for it.

[kliqzangel.livejournal.com]

You know, I have read this series though I don't know how many times. But, I wanted to take a moment to say that I think this (and the previous) are two of my favorite stories in the series.

I am a huge Derek/Spencer fan and I love how you write them both.